MY AMERICAN DREAMS: THRU' HIS EYES OF MINE

Central Park, New York - May 2015

First day of August 2014, he departed to The United States of America.

Yep! Leaving me all behind.

Like I really, really couldn't help it!

He left me for a great deal : education.

By any means and in any ways, I just simply could never ruin his dream - even if it means parting millions miles away!

I always told myself that I was gonna be okay once he left, but of course I failed. I felt empty - exactly like what I felt when my mom passed away years ago.

Cold. Grey. Completely lonesome. Absolutely on my own.

For he is not only the man I married. A family. But also, the one I want to spend my days and nights, goods and bads with - the cherry to my pie, the straw to my berry, the cream to my Oreo! Once he leaves, what am I gonna do?

INDONESIAN MEAL: MADE AT HOME

I feel like a lone wolf - though I am not, necessarily, lonely. 

Seriously!

Another thing is that I have always been a homey person, which likely limiting my time for social life for staying in alone instead of social outing - for staying myself. I love staying at home, doing house chores (despite a messy kinda personality of me!), being 'lazy' all the time, indulging myself in endless me-time (along with good music, great books, homemade delicacies, and, probably, daydreaming). There is no stopping me from spending my time in everywhere I call home.

I always feel secured being at home. Whenever I go out following my wanderlust sentiments, I always feel happy at the most to come home, at last! It is quite an oxymoron thingy as I love lingering indoor at home, yet keen on travelling outdoor to the (almost) unknown world full of breathtaking adventures, like, yeah, YOLO, you really really only live once! So, there is no time and nothing to waste!

Being a loner is sometimes a lonely state of mind. I find it quite miserable to realize that I am literally alone. Not that I badly need to be surrounded by my few friends, but I want to get myself involved in a crowd. Not necessarily nor actively getting along - just being there to soak up the bright of cheered up social atmosphere. Or else, simply following my outdoor mood. Sometimes. Only sometimes.

Most of the time? Feeling like a lone star, and being like one, is never too much that I live for in my life. It is one of the best things happening to me!