passing almost 30 years of my life, i realize that dreams do come true.
it has been such a mighty excellent work of God that i am able to experience those things i thought were just on my mind.
i am aware that God seems not giving me what's exactly given to everybody else : quick timing. while other people have their dreams come true at the very beginning of their lifetime, i kind of - well - have my own much later on. it's not a big problem anyway, for God has given what's precisely the best for me. still, i enjoy it all eventhough a lot of people will think that it's kinda too late. hey, c'mon! everybody just couldn't agree no more, right?
i can't simply deny the fact that i feel alive when i'm dreaming something. i got those days when my dreams got into nightmares and doomed to fail, and i was devastated much. whereas, there were days when my dreams just popped out into reality - through either unexpectedly sweet or unbelievably hard ways. sometimes, i insist on having my dreams because i just can hardly think about other dreams to have and keep me alive. some other time, i change my dreams wisely because i just know that i can't keep them living in me. i think, by wisely changing my dreams, i will not lose my self-respect and still feel that lively sense within me which will do nothing but cheering me up every single damn day of mine.
daring myself to have those dreams in me means i have to be ready to have them alone. i just know that not everybody can understand and approve what i have been dreaming of these times. i truly realize that some even show their disapprovals by abandoning me without even giving me any chance to let them see that what i have may somewhat their concerns, too. it does hurt most of the time when i think that they should have supported me all the way, but as time goes by, i know that my dreams are my personal thingy, so why bother having those people stand by me for my dreams? so, i think it will be a one-man show. my show. suprisingly, i have gotten that self-confidence which courages me to take step up to make my dreams come true on my own. literally on my own, but actually, in the process and in reality, there are utterly extraordinary figures who will help me do so.
being at the very blessing of 29-year-old phase, i have those dreams come into me - lively as ever. i can say that they are somewhat of new dreams - simply inspired by some predominant things. some things deal with California or Turkey, getting married & having cute kids, and travelling into beautiful island. the other thing is dealing with one sketchy nite when i drew on a piece of paper and had it water-colored in astonishment. now i just gotta find a good way to make my dreams come true. i won't doubt them, even if it means i have to walk alone.
'' Dear Feet, be strong!"
picture: private document
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